I saw The Graduate, started listening to Simon and Garfunkel

I've decided recently that I'll grow my hair out. One of my friends said that longer hair of mine would naturally turn to dreadlocks. Clearly, she understands little of Jew hair. I guess that for some reason, since I've been feeling more secure in my college situation, I should just generally tend to my hair less. Seems collegey to me. Initially I was going to "go for the fro," but I wonder if this mass on my head will turn into something wholly different. My control over it is dwindling. More on personal news: got new shoes, saw drunken master (jackie chan, 1978), and have been feeling generally better. DePaul's been sending me so much mail, my world is turning into that scene in Harry Potter where all the letters flood in from every orifice of the house. Depaul's owls are many...

I'm also considering switching this site from blogger to wordpress.

I always make up stories and characters and universes in my head. I develop things, play things out, et cetera. Essentially, that's what this blog is for. I've been getting more critical of my imagination lately, though. I don't know why. Getting a better look at my creations, I see that they aren't really as great as I want them to be. I've also had less of an urge to put them down here, possibly because of illogical fears of embarrassment or plagiarism. These things just hang around in my mind, acting as daydreams and fantasies, but I just can't bring myself to make them anything more. I want to manifest them; I want to really bring them to life. Maybe I need a good angle and a steadfast direction...
Those apparitions have existed for years, though. I'll get them out into the world sometime somehow.

I've had a stronger urge to lay off the scifi and fantasy genres and focus on more realistic subjects. There are a few ideas in the table right now, such as a lengthy story of a young man building and dating a robot, set in the near future. It feels like there's some good potential there. In an effort to satiate my love of violence, I'm also considering a story of an extremely skilled and successful assassin, in a modern setting, likely written in an interview-format. I might start soon on the former idea.

Regressing to less productive subjects of frustration (once again), I'll mention that picking a path for my life isn't getting any easier. My options are too many, and my desires too fantastic. The fact that I still try to express my persistent imagination should sway me in one direction. Yet still, I feel responsibility to get involved in politics, as well as passion to gain expertise in math and science. I guess my future is a lot like those ideas I wrote about earlier. I keep getting more and more, and I want to embrace them all. They all feel so wonderful; they could all be so great. But, they are all intangible, and intangible have they stayed. When I try to pursue just one, I never reach the satisfaction I was looking for. Satisfaction in these matters I have never known.

Oh well. I may not know exactly where I'm going, but at least I know I'm going.